I've never, have you?

Statements in bold are true:

I've Never Kissed A Member Of The Opposite Sex - "loosely moralled" is the polite term, I believe.

I've Never Kissed A Member Of The Same Sex - points upwards.

I've Never Crashed A Friend's Car - I have (Sorry Dylan!) but it was his fault anyway. I did tell him the story of How I Managed to Pass my Driving test (hardly legal) but he still insisted on seeing me drive.

I've Never Been To Japan - but this is soon to change, unless I'm for not seeing my absolute eldest brother for another 18 months. Decisions decisions.

I've Never Been In A Taxi - of course I've been in a taxi. Just not recently, cos a taxi across London costs an arm and a leg, and I'd rather use my arms and legs to walk with; s'all about balance, dontcha know.

I've Never Been In Love

I've Never Had Sex In Public - oh, yes. I had sex in a lift when I first moved to London, and nothings changed; I'm still impatient.

I've Never Been Dumped - last week was the most recent example, but I can't be doing with that "mutual agreement" rubbish.

I've Never Done Cocaine - which is suprising in itself; I'm a boarding school girl, most things were available- I'm just suprised it never came up.

I've Never Shoplifted - Penny sweets, for the most part, and I still do this. But the main things I shoplifted as a kid were cheap hair bobbles from the local chemist; I'd slip them round my wrist and saunter out with noone any the wiser.

I've Never Been Fired - mostly, I suspect, because I've never had a real job. But there's plently of time for all that, right?

I've Never Been In A Fist Fight - my, how very common. I've been slapped, and had a drink thrown at me by an irate ex, but... no.

I've Never Had Group Intercourse

I've Never Snuck Out Of My Parents' House - there was never any need, plus I'm too clumsy to sneak in a house full of china dogs and african art; and it would be too expensive, what with the host of blackmailing little siblings. If I wanted to go clubbing I'd be "staying at a friends", or I'd just wait til they went away. Now, sneaking in and out of my room at school was something else entirely, and an art form.

I've Never Been Tied Up - and let me just say, rope burns are the hardest thing in the world to hide from prying eyes. Particularly if one has to play bridesmaid at a wedding the next day.

I've Never Regretted Having Sex With Someone - it happens. My first ever girlfriend, the completely unstable one from a previous post is one of these.

I've Never Been Arrested - I've been in a car that was pulled over; my fault entirely, since I was so drunk in the passenger seat I was slumped in an unfortunate position that may have looked to passers by like I was giving the driver a blow job. I wasn't, but who knows what goes on in the minds of policemen?

I've Never Made Out With A Stranger - after a few drinks I lose all sense of proportion and propriety..

I've Never Stolen Something From My Job - I don't have a job :) but give it time.

I've Never Celebrated New Years In Times Square - I've never even been to America, it just doesn't appeal to me.

I've Never Gone On A Blind Date - I'm so glad I can say this!

I've Never Lied To A Friend - Oh, of course I have. Lies range from the thoughtless "no darling, that looks gorgeous on you" to the slightly more serious.

I've Never Had A Crush On A Teacher - Many many years ago; he was the rogue male in an all girls school, and he was cute. He had these little grey side burns and an unidentfiable accent.

I've Never Been To Europe - Well, yeah. Turkey, Ireland, Britain, France, Germany, Holland, Luxembourg, Switzerland. If any of those aren't actually in Europe, just don't tell me.

I've Never Skipped School - I missed every single Physics lesson in my last year of high school; no easy feat, let me tell you, but before that I was ever such a good girl. Thinking back, that might explain why I failed my GCSEs and was subsequently rejected by four of my six universities.

I've Never Slept With A Co-Worker - I've slept with many a fellow student, but I've never had coworkers. Unless you count the work experience I did aged 15 and my brief Xmas stint as an elf- no to both; smelly archeologists and balding greasy shop keepers have never appealed, funnily enough.

I've Never Cut Myself On Purpose - no. No no no, I'm far too much of a sissy to do anything of the kind, and its not like I don't cut myself enough accidentally without trying to do it.

I've Never Had Sex At The Office

I've Never Been Married

I've Never Been Divorced yawn. I'm the child of divorce, and its really not as bad as teenybopper mags like to make out.

I've Never Had Sex With More Than One Person Within The Same Week

I've Never Posed Nude - I don't do photos, not even fully clothed ones; I can't seem to get the knack of smiling on command without looking like a special. And special as in, there are schools to teach them to dress themselves, as opposed to precious and fab.

I've Never Gotten Someone Drunk Just To Have Sex With Them - but this does seem to be quite the thing to do on my uni campus; I may not do it- I'm far too cheap to buy someone else drinks- but it has been done to me; I'm just working on getting the self-extraction-after-just-enough-drinks thing down to a T.

I've Never Killed Anyone

I've Never Received Scars From My Sex Partner - I have nail marks on one of my wrists from, once again, the scary ex who's been honoured with a whole post to herself. Clingy clingy clingy.

I've Never Thrown Up In A Bar - I've thrown up in the toilets at a bar, but I'm choosing to believe this doesn't count.

I've Never Purposely Set A Part Of Myself On Fire - again, I might be drama queen with a love of the limelight, but I refuse to go quite so far.

I've Never Eaten Sushi - Ooh I adore sushi!

I've Never Been Snowboarding - very true, and I don't regret this one bit; sport doesn't appeal- I can't even ski- and extreme sport makes me vair nervous.

I've Never Had Sex At A Friend's House While They Were Throwing A Party

I've Never Had Sex In A Dressing Room No! There's always a gap at the bottom of the curtain, and the curtain never pulls all the way round anyway- I don't do public shows. Sheesh.

I've Never Flashed Anyone - I'm a lady plus I've heard far too many stories about people drunkenly flashing people in bars who later turn out to be their parents' new friend.

I've Never Met Anyone From Online